Home Again, Home Again....

I was released from the Hospital yesterday, March 14th at 4 days post-op.  I have to say that Day 3 was really pretty good but Day 4 I felt yucky.  Physically and emotionally.  I am feeling very overwhelmed by all the information out there about what to do/not to do as well as reading up on the Web about people who've had the same thing (both raging successes and warnings of failure).  I think I may need to just step away.

I am trying to figure out something that works for me and since there are so many pieces to fit in (protein goals, liquid goal, vitamins, meds, etc) I think I need to keep a schedule and just record everything.  I'm also having issues figuring out how much to eat.  They give us size guidelines (in 1/2c or 1/4c type denominations), and then we have to calculate our protein intake (which is all based on weighted ounces - - different that cup measurements).  Add to that that you're supposed to eat until you're 'comfortably sated".  Um.  If I was good at reading my stomach/hunger like that I probably wouldn't have been obese.  So, it's a learning curve.  I clearly didn't get enough of *anything* in yesterday and felt like crap.  Today I'm trying to focus on getting all my liquid and protein in.  Thing is you read people who have like 2 tsp of food and are 'stuffed'.  Months and months out I should be able to comfortably eat 6oz at a time.  Um, my second meal (yogurt) I had 3 oz like NO PROBLEM and I just stopped eating b/c I was so freaked out that I wasn't full and that I was able to take that much.  It's such a mind fuck.

Anyway, sleep is awful. I actually miss my very adjustable hospital bed :(  I am trying to get off the Percocet but I feel like I need it to help with sleep/sleep pain if nothing else!

About pain, it's really only been achy and sore the past few days.  Like I did a few million sit-ups or something. However yesterday I passed out on our couch after getting home and woke about an hour later, went to stand up and saw stars.  I am still sore from that one movement :(  I have no idea what that nap did but I'm pissed and just hoping it didn't mess up any sutures or anything.

So, for today, I said I'm focusing on liquid and protein.  I've already had half my protein shake from yesterday (15g) and had 16oz of liquid.  In a day I need to get 60-80g protein (and try to only use one shake and get rest from food) and 64oz+ of water/liquid.  I also managed to get down the liquid Colace (the devil, but I fear the alternative...).   I think later I'll have an egg.  I am just really struggling with the am I hungry?  but I need to eat.  Wait, am I full?  Don't know.  It's so hard.  I am scared to death of making a mistake and that this will all be for nothing.

Anyway if you made it this far go have a cookie for me.  I'll close with some pics b/c blogs are always more interesting with pictures.

I slept in the guest room last night and this is the nest of pillows I created to try to sleep somewhat upright/reclined like in the hospital.

Incisions.  Hard to see them, right?  This is something I'm the most shocked about.  I have six - one under/between my boobs, 4 on the main part of my belly that you can easily, and then the 6th is in my belly button (and I've pulled my pants down to give you that loooooovely shot of my belly button, my pants actually fit and I don't look like that walking around town.  Also, I normally wear a bra (what?! I was going to bed).